Dog Haiku

Posted by Stephan Otto, ALDF's Director of Legislative Affairs on September 8, 2009

While there are always many important issues to blog about here at ALDF, once in awhile, especially during these dog days of summer, a little levity seems warranted. So please accept this post in that vein.

I was forwarded this list of  "dog haiku" many years ago and just recently stumbled across it once again. I hope you enjoy them.

Dog Haiku

I love my human;
Thus I perfume myself with
This long-rotten squirrel.

I lie belly-up
In the sunshine, happier than
You ever will be

Today I sniffed
Many dog behinds-I celebrate
By kissing your face.

I sound the alarm!
Paper boy-come to kill us all
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I sound the alarm!
Garbage man-come to kill us all
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I lift my leg and
Whiz on each bush. Hello, Spot-
Sniff this and weep!

How do I love thee?
The ways are numberless as
My hairs on the rug.

My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle.

I hate my choke chain
Look, world, they strangle me!
Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack!

Sleeping here, my chin
On your foot-no greater bliss-
well, maybe chasing cats.

Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much I do

The cat is not all
Bad-she fills the litter box
With Tootsie Rolls

Dig under fence-why?
Because it’s there. Because it’s
There. Because it’s there.

I am your best friend,
Always, and especially
When you are eating.

You are my stamp pad
The mud I rolled in makes nice
Patterns on white shirts.

Squirrels, birds, and cats
Run everywhere, taunting me
I must chase them all.

It is morning now
I lick your sleeping face
Wake up – play with me!

I see my human
Thus I must take wing and fly
Is my name "Down, dog!"?

-Author unknown


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